Wedding Details

I've taken down the directions, which presumably no one needs any longer. I'll be adding more information here as time goes on, like links to pictures.

The Ceremony

Many people asked us about our vows and exchange of rings, both of which we wrote.

The vows

We each said:

As your beloved and your friend, I choose to walk life's path with you. I promise to love you for who you are, and who you will become. I promise to care for you and keep you close to my heart; to celebrate with you during good times and keep you safe and secure in bad times. I promise to make you laugh, to wipe away your tears, and to lift you up when you stumble. I promise to create a family with you grounded in joy and love, and to help you hold true to yourself and your dreams. I promise to love you for the rest of my days.

The exchange of rings

As the program noted, the Jewish wedding band exchange involves placing the band not on the ring finger but on the index finger, as an offering. The recipient moves the band to the ring finger to indicate acceptance. In order to express these themes of offering and accepting, we said the following. The one giving the ring said:

I give this ring as a symbol of myself. To you I give myself, for I am yours.

Michelle responded with

I'll have no husband, if you be not he.

and Lance responded with

I'll ne'er wed woman, if you be not she.

This is an adaptation of Rosalind's lines in the final scene of As You Like It. She has been disguised as a man, and reveals herself to the assembled characters, including her father, her husband, and the woman who wooed her thinking she was a man. To her husband she says, "To you I give myself, for I am yours"; and after hearing their reactions she tells them, in turn, "I'll have no father, if you be not he: / I'll have no husband, if you be not he: / Nor ne'er wed woman, if you be not she."