Otter Perry ottertee at silverwinggraphics.com
Tue May 15 23:50:49 EDT 2007

On May 15, 2007, at 7:32 PM, Robyn Starkey wrote:

> Well, I didn't think of her feminism as being the main issue in her 
> rottenness, because she is very like my mother. :-P
> But thinking about it more, there is a stereotype in older books about 
> mothers who are neglectful because they have a particular passion or 
> interest (in older books is also about mothers who work), and this 
> leads them to neglect their children. Look at James, James, Morrison's 
> mother in the A. A. Milne poem. In girls' school stories (I'm thinking 
> particularly of Chalet School), there are mothers, and other female 
> caregivers, who neglect their children for particular passions they 
> have for things like vegetarianism, or who bring their children up 
> poorly because they have Ideas. I don't know if all this qualifies as 
> a stereotype, but it is a fairly common thing.

None of us has a perfect mother.  Some of us have good
mothers, but many of us don't.  I think if there's something
to blame -- like interest in something other than us, the
children -- then it's going to get blamed.

My mother was a good deal less than perfect and had
some very strong interests outside her home and
children.  But, to be fair, I think she'd have been a
good deal less than perfect even if she'd stayed home.
And a lot less happy, probably.

And I think she could have been a much better mother
and still done all the things she did.

I'm kind of flailing around here with something I should be
able to put much more concisely, but I'm too tired at the
moment to think this through.

I do know that we all deserve perfect parents and we none
of us get them.  We get people like us for parents.


I support the labeling of obesity as a disease.

I have always wanted to call in fat to work.

More information about the Dwj mailing list