Merlin spoilers (was Re: Ready for Merlin?)

Anna Z Skarzynska theania at
Sat Jun 28 07:25:39 EDT 2003

> There's no doubt that Nick resented it; though, he says so himself.  Not
> entirely Rupert's suspicious mind, I think.

Well, no-one is so noble that s/he would not feel at least one teensy pang
of resentment at having some chance of a lifetime snatched away because some
inconsiderate so-and-so chose to get into trouble, fall ill, die, whatever,
at precisely the wrong time. It's not the same as acting on it.

> Not sure I understand this.  If not-needy, then presumably everyone who is
> needy at all is needier than him.  So not-pandering could be construed as
> "lacking sympathy with something he doesn't himself suffer", which is not
> so much confident as unimaginative, surely...

What I was getting at was that confident people can be quite oblivious to
the fact that others are not. Which forces those less confident/more needy
to get off their own backsides and do something, instead of waiting to be
rescued, so it's not a bad thing. I hasten to add that I am moving onto the
general here, out of the DS/Merl context.

> Do you mean, by "needy", "deliberately setting oneself up as an object for
> pity" rather than being *genuinely* in need?  If so I would wholeheartedly
> agree.  "The tyranny of the weak", somebody once called it.  Um.
> Heyer, possibly?  The way of behaving that goes "I am Not Very Healthy
> therefore you must do what I say and never disagree with me because if you
> do you'll make me be *ill*", only more along the lines "I am an
> therefore it is your duty to do everything for me".  (Minor examples being
> people who break things when they wash up, or else do it really badly so
> has to be done again later to get the last of the food off the plates...
> and so can never be trusted -- for which read expected -- to do the
> washing-up.  Mutter mutter mutter.  Snarl.)
> Or have I completely misunderstood what you were driving at there?  If I
> have, please explain...

No, you haven't. I think I may have ranted a little because neediness is a
particular pet hate of mine. It tends to go with helplessness and utter lack
of dignity. Another name for this revolting condition is 'psychic
vampirism'. You know these people who leave you emotionally drained after
spending anything more than twenty minutes with them? Who blame all their
misfortunes on others? Who are incapable of accepting any responsibility for
their own fate? Grrr....


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