christmas book wishes

deborah deborah at
Sat Dec 20 20:44:39 EST 2003

On Sat, 20 Dec 2003, Robyn Starkey wrote:

|Okay, well, can you answer this question -- would it be helpful to an
|advanced Stylistics class? My class were so bored with their regular
|grammatical textbook that they didn't read it at all, which kind of defeats
|the point.

It's only for punctuation, but it is fun.  Some sample sentences:

  To explain appositives: "Nobiscus Kahn, professor of angst, used to
  cry all over his lectern and ruin his lovingly prepared notes."

  Incorrect placememnt of comma between subject and predicate: "Our
  darling Timosha, expired last night after brushing your heart off his

  Quotation marks for unusual turn of phrase: "He said that for some
  *other* Christmas he'd give me a guide to safe sex with satyrs and
  centaurs, and a 'going-places rocking horse.'"

  Apostrophes for missing letters: "Honey, yer bra strap's been
  slitherin' down yer shoulder since you stopped yer cheatin' ways."

  Commas and adverbial phrases: "The goat, after eating her lederhosen,
  started in on her Durrenmatt."

  Colons: "The baby vampire tries out his baby teeth on surfaces that
  are fun to puncture: golf balls, plastic Coke bottles, balloons."

These are all from the _New_ WTS.

"I'm a very gentle man, not unlike Gandhi. ... I could kill them
at any moment. But that's really just if they annoy me."
		 -- Joss Whedon

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