Many subjects (very long)
emcmullin at kl.com
Mon Jul 24 10:57:38 EDT 2000
"There are too damn many people in London, and they tend to resent it when
you bump into them. I have to think as I walk now, which is terrible. (It
tends to be "now if I ruled the world, commuters would be issued cattle
prods to use on tourists who stand in the middle of the pavement in the rush
hour to look at their maps upside down"). Maybe I should get a walkman to
listen to books instead."
lol! We are at the height of tourist season in D.C. and I was just feeling
particularly irritated about it. There is a sort of universally unspoken
rule of commuter metro that one stands on the right of the escalator and
walks on the left. The tourists...the tourists! They stand on the left.
They stand on the right. The stand in front of the escalator while they
think about riding it. They stand right in front of the top of the
escalator impeding absolutely everyone behind them as they ever so slowly
look around or even consult maps.
Actually, they remind me of the cats in my life. Their names are Reilly
(Ace of Spies), Simba (the second) and Rajah (the only she-cat and no, my
friend the owner did not care for Rani). I call them Underfoot and
Undertoe, Hairball and Fuzzy. I also call Simba - The Chef, because he is
fascinated by all food preparation, even if he detests the food being
prepared. The nicknames are otherwise interchangeable. Next I shall be
calling the tourists Underfoot and Undertoe.
Sometimes as I move slowly among a huge herd of
commuters/tourists/fellowhumans, I get the urge to 'moo' or 'baa.' To 'baa'
would be a more direct allusion to Kierkegaard, but one can't count on
everyone knowing that layer, or assuming I do. And I have practiced the
'moo' on many a long car trip through the countryside.
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